Anxiety?

Stop investing your valuable resources in things you can't change,

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The smell and feel of the antibacterial gel, disinfectant and sanitizing wipes are now part of our daily lives. For most of us, it's a situation that, while it does raise stress levels a bit, is still manageable. Not so for people who, even before this pandemic, suffered from anxiety disorders, depression and emotional instability.

But what to do? Society, therapists, psychologists, teachers, religious leaders and even our families bombard us with advice and phrases that, when they reach our hearing, are empty words, whose meaning is lost in an echo that gradually fades away until it is lost in our ears.

Grandmothers say well, when we make mistakes, even after they themselves have warned us of the consequences of our actions: 'You can't learn from another's mistakes'. A great truth, because it helps us to listen and read thousands of tips and advice, to daily read texts with '5 tips for this' and '6 tips for that', if at the end, each person has a different perception of the world; the experiences are recorded differently in each human being.

What for my mother was an unbreakable chain of behavior, to me it has no value, because the experience she went through is not part of my reality and vice versa.

Advise? Self-help books? Meditation?

Although advice, readings, meditation, podcasts and the increasingly widespread part of 'self-help books' in the bookstore help you get your thoughts going and encourage you to seek new ways and change your perception of things, it is not until you yourself reflect on the situation you are experiencing and the conditions around you. No matter how much you explain it to your best friend, your therapist, your school principal, or even your immediate boss, the perception of what you are experiencing will never be in accordance with the perception of the person who is listening to your words... Yes, I know you are thinking "great help from this person, I just read a few paragraphs and I feel more helpless than before"... don't worry, I am just trying to move and shake your thought pattern, as soon as the good thing starts.

On this basis - which sounds a bit daunting , but don't worry, it's not - now I want to give you a great tool, which you may never have thought of: Coaching.

The title of this article is about "stop wasting the valuable resources you have, on situations shaped by your mind, which do NOT exist". For the basis of anxiety, our most acclaimed and recurring modern condition, is the result of a process and pattern of thinking anchored in our mind. A pattern that paradoxically is extremely valuable, because thanks to this state of 'alertness' (converted into anxiety) we have survived as a human race since we walked semi-erect.

Turn off the alarm!

But what happens when this alarm never stops ringing? Well, then you enter a state of anxiety, which in turn leads to a state of depression, because in your mind you live NOW the unreal situation that your brain only imagined, in order to prepare you for a possible situation of danger, where you must flight or fight for your life.

I have several friends and family who suffer from anxiety and it is very sad to observe as from one second to another, they start to tremble and have difficulty breathing. Some feel a tightness in their chest and feel like they are about to go into cardiac arrest. And so, it happens, without any conscious 'trigger'. If you are one of these people suffering from anxiety, this is what is happening in your mind: You are investing a great deal of energy, imagining a series of danger scenarios, that is, consciously or unconsciously, because your mind has developed a marked path in the connection of its synapses. In order for you to understand me, imagine a total darkness and that you are driving on a road, where you can see absolutely nothing, but the fluorescent signs that are marked on this road. That is, you do not know where to go, just follow that path ... so your thought pattern works. Which is engraved and is the only road you know. I hope that the first question that jumps out of your mind is: and then how (#%$^&@*) in heaven can I switch this pattern of behaviour. I did not even notice that I have living like this!

Well, just like when you can't see anything walking on that dark road and you're scared and you're stressed out, because you can't even see anything and you wish it would be light already, or there would be a light on the road, well you can 'turn on the lights in your mind'!

And how can you realize all this? Well…good news, through coaching!

How does it work?

By applying neuro-linguistic programming techniques, guided questions and, empathy from your coach. You can design different neuronal paths from those you have always pursued; in other words, you are capable of turning off that intermittent "danger, danger, danger" alarm, because even though I tell you that what you are imagining in your subconscious does not even exist and that you are only trapped in a cage built by yourself, of which only you have the key and can get out whenever you want. It is useless to be told by your parents, friends, psychologists or spiritual guides, or to read books on how to fight anxiety, until you understand this dark path and see that you can turn on the light yourself and only you, the situation of "fight or flight" will be present in every minute of your life. Yes, maybe you can relax with a good glass of wine or with some other nervous system suppressor - as I call them - but the only thing you are doing is 'numbing' your synapses that cause this thinking behavior, you are giving your mind a 'rattle' to entertain itself and not to resume its known and familiar thought pattern.

To finish with this reflection, I want to tell you that, thanks to this pattern of thought, you are probably alive, possibly the only way you have been able to survive some traumatic and extremely painful experience; thanks to this 'life strategy' you have reached this point, it is also possible that you get out of bed with a great effort and perhaps also, although it sounds raw, the only reason why you have not decided to give it all up. So, embrace this thought in your mind and say thank you! But also tell yourself that the situation you experienced when your mind created this great survival strategy no longer exists! Let your mind drop its weapons and let it help you develop another pattern and another path, for, as the saying goes, "All roads lead to Rome".

If you really want to change your survival strategies and stop wasting precious resources and valuable energy on ideas and thoughts that do not yet exist, and if you also want to turn off the intermittent danger alarm that overwhelms you, without you even realizing it, do a holistic coaching session. Unlike long years of therapy, where you only think about it, through coaching you work on yourself, you analyze the situation, you evaluate the possible solutions and you take responsibility for your behavior, you direct your thoughts and you make the decisions that will totally change your life.

It's time to 'turn on the light' and stop running or getting ready to fight and, above all, to 'dope yourself' so that you don't have to deal with your mind, which seems to 'command itself' as my grandmother used to say...

Change your life in a sustainable and conscious way, book a coaching session now!